Pretty Blue Flowers in the Forest with me.

Today was a very great day.
Today was my first ride of the endurance season.
Today was the first time I ever went round on my own, without B Ecky holding my hoof.
Today I went supa fast.

Today I was supa sensible.
Today other horsie's humans said nice things about me.
Today my human was Xstra-E-merly PROUD of me.

Today I wake'ed up rather early.
Today I traveled in the silver box all the way to the Forest of Dean.
Today I was pleasant to the vet.
Today I only threatened to flatten the farrier once whilst he was checking my shiny shoes. (Doesn't he know Mr.Duggan only just putted them on?)
Today I wore my BIT in my MOUTH!

Today I saw lots of four legged woolly woofas on leads walking their humans.
Today I saw lots of the special horses with no legs and 2 wheels spinning up and down big hills.
Today I stopped to spook at 3 donkeys being walked on leads, I think their humans think they're woofas.
Today I did the map carrying all by myself and kept look out for any scary monsters hiding behind logs and things.
Today I trotted and cantered my way around 41km (that's 25.5 miles)!

Today I saw Pretty Blue flowers, which my humans says were "Bells". They didn't make a noise though!?

Today I got a rosette with Grade 3 on it.
Today I ate my weight in haylage.

Today I ate a bag of carrots :-)
Today my human said she thinks I'm FABULOUS!
Today I travelled all the way home and made a lot of noiseys to show Jobi how much I missed him. (He couldn't come, its far to BIG of a day for his little old legs.)
Today I was BRILLIANT.


Tonight I will sleep....ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Tomorrow is when I begin to plot my next endurance adventure!

Fabulously Funky Forestry Frolic'y Fun!

Its official, I am IMPORTANT!

The day started with me being woken up SUPER early and heading on my trailer to the place with all the trees again. I like it there. My chauffeur had to go and "Steward" in her truck so my human and I were left with our kit, abandoned. And get this...the cheek of it,  she tied me to a TREE! All the other horses had smart trailers and lorries to tie to and I had a TREE! It was a mighty large and superior tree I have to admit and it had hay net hanging facilities, but I was still tied to a TREE in a public area, I must looked silly!

(No Photo of my tree parking as human forgot to use clicky flashy device!)

Today on my ride I had my own Entourage, Posse, Crew, Gang, Disciples, OFFICIAL STALKERS! They followed ME the whole way, except the old grey lady who over took from time to time, I hope I can still go that fast when I'm in my 20's!

The Entourage!

Today was a FUN ride! My human doesn't usually pre-plan her fun but it was very clear that today I had to behave and ensure we had FUN! I enjoyed myself and the disciples seemed jolly enough!

On our FUN ride, we have to follow the r'arrows, a pointy line thing on white signs. It was my job to look out for the signs and turn super quick if I saw any!

R'arrows to follow...

We didn't miss any turns and never got lost, not even one time! I had been on most of the tracks lots of times before but the human said we had to follow the r'arrows today as it made sure the ride was more FUN!

This is where the r'arrows tooked us for our FUN!

On our ride I saw lots of great things; I love looking and checking for forestry monsters which lurk in the dark areas. It is also important to leap over the odd puddle just to check the human is still awake whilst I am busy navigating. (It's funny to teach the entourage to jump over puddles!) 

I see'd trees...

I see'd more trees...

I see'd these trees today too!

We had some super fast blasts when it was clear and I was near the front for all of them, most of my posse were kinda slow for creatures of the 4 legged variety!

Our Start-i-lights on the G-pee-S inform us of the complicated technical stuff above. My human says she thinks her Start-i-lights may be on the blink as she thinks our MAX speed is a little above possible. "Surely a wonky legged endurance machine can't really travel at 97mph?!" I was super fast tho ;-)

Having FUN! 

So all in all, I had a fabulously FUN ride with my human :-) Thanks to Kath (AKA "The Boss") and all her gang for organising the super fabulous funky fab FUN ride. I hope you raised lots of pennies to help at the local school and playgroup! I enjoyed spending time with the gang and my human says she misses having an insane group of followers on her rides, so maybe they'll let us help out with the riding school stuff again soon?! 

Nighty Night xxx

Why’d you call it “Ladies” Pony Club? I'm NO lady!

Yawn... I've just about gained back enough energy to tell you about my exceptionally busy workend. 

Saturday:

I look my ladies out for a spin around the block. We even managed to get through the roaring river, now that it’s not so deep for my tootsies. I got rather excited on the way home and did some rather BEAUTiful tap dancing and even treated my human to a buck!

Just 2 of my ladies...

I attended a Slumber party at the riding school on Saturday night, as my drivers were on strike Sunday Morning. You just can't get the staff!

Sunday:

Sunday was our monthly visit to “Ladies” Pony Club. I have no idea why they call it “Ladies” day, as all who attended were quite clearly handsome and talented geldings!

“Ladies” Pony Club is very strange for several reasons:

1. The humans cackle and giggle rather more than is strictly necessary, keeping their jokes a bit too private for my liking. I do not find them very amusing!

2. We have to go into the battle ring TWICE, yes you heard me, TWICE! The battle ring is all sandy and has stuff in it, like pony eating poles and whistling posts.

3. Madam Rachael, who doesn't seem to have a horse, stands in the middle and shouts things. She hands out pats to horses that are clever, and chats about how good (or bad) we are at stuff. I’m not convinced Madam Rachael knows how clever I am!

4. The “Ladies” consume vast quantities of tea and coffee. This is not an issue, as I am partial to a cup of tea, soy milk with ½ a sugar please. They hide in the barn room for a while and emerge with new and crazy ideas.

5. It lasts ALL day!

So in the morning, I tried my darndest to show Madam Rachael how smart I could be. My human even made me wear my bestest, smartest, boringest bridle, not a bit of lime green in sight! I walked all sensible, hardly any spookies even though it was gale force blustery. I trotted properly, in a rhythm, 1,2,1,2,1,2,1,2. I turned circles, bent a little, listened to the leg (well the left one) and carried my head at a reasonable height.

UNTIL, it was time to canter!

Please take into account that I hadn't managed to canter ALL week. I showed uber amounts of enthusiasm and speediness. My tail doubled up as a rotor blade and propelled me brilliantly. I didn’t want to frighten my human so I lifted my head super high, this meant she couldn’t really see the blurry scenery passing her by! Madam Rachael kept shouting for my human to “Sit on me”, this confused me a lot, as I’m positive she was still up there!!! 

At the end the other boys all got pats and comments. Madam Rachael laughed at me and then she did something SHOCKING:

Ready, aim...

SHOCKING!

Later on, after my hay break, we went back into the battle ring and Madam Rachael built exciting looking fences to leap over. I was much sleepier in the battle ring during our PM session, since I had used up a lot of my enthusiasm the first time around. I cannot describe how wonderful I was in the afternoon, so here is the evidence: Click here to see video evidence of me being a supa dupa cleva pony!

WHAT A DAY!!!

Finally, Flip came to drive me home and when we arrived it was clear that Troy had missed me. He even took matters into his own hands to ensure Flip could drive me no further!

Troy shall not, troy shall not be moved!

Here I am looking fabulously tired and snugly after my exciting weekend. 

Laters Ladies,

The Rock
      x

Why are all the trees sleeping?

So today, I went on a propa run!
The sun was shining and the scary wild blowing had stopped, perfect weather for a run.

Flip, the human drove me and human mummy away from the river wild towards the hills. When we arrived my ginger friend, Santo was still in his Pajama's and covered in the muddiness. I had to wait with super big patience while Aunty Claire (another human) got him all presentable for our adventure.

Waiting...

Finally he was ready :-) And his human NEARLY was...

Wake Up Santo!

The people got on us and I was all bouncing, ready to go get em, however MY human said she need to "locate the satellites" so that we could do propa training. So then there was a bit more waiting...

The start i lights must have been hiding, it took ages to find them!

Eventually, she found the darn things and we could GO! Our ride was super exciting, there are lots of food houses out on the tracks for feeding the white woolly monsters at this time of year. Santo is still young and naive, he fears the woolly monster feeders, but I did lead the way past them all :)

It was extra soggy under my feets today, silly rain, and the puddles looked particularly horrific in places, I tippy, tapped around them when possible and also drank from the clean shiny looking ones. 

Drinky at the giant poodles! (Stretch mummy)

As a consequence of all the puddle binge drinking, I had too pee many times! Remember equines, it's important to stay super hydrated on long runs!

I got supa dooopa over the top excited on the way to the tree race course and had to keep myself calm by performing my special bouncathon walk with matching helicopter tail. Aunty Claire thought this was hilarious, she likes to take pictures. 

SOOOOO exciting...

Once we arrived in the place with all the trees we soon came across some small issues... Lots of the trees had been drinking far too much and had all fallen down!

Under it...

Under it...

Around it...

We went over one but forgot to get the camera out because we were all too busy cheering Santo on for his brave'ness. I forgot to mention that he is an "ex-race" equine and therefore thinks life is all about leaping over things and going speedier than the other horse. If you ask me, he's not that good at being a race horse, i always get to the finish much qwicka!

 The view at the top was pretty and us equines enjoyed looking at it whilst the humans chatted and used their clicky snappy devices.

CHEEESE!

But seriously the view...

We had a great ride with lots of drunk tree avoiding and racing up hills. My stat nav recons we went quite far today. 

What the Stat i lights told me

When I arrived back at Santo's house, there were lots of children doing Pony Club and enjoying the sun shining weather. A few of my miniature people friends came over to see me and I was super nice to them, no mean behaviour. They were great head scratching posts, just the right height!

The friendly scratching posts, telling me how wonderful I am.

Over all a fun filled and muchly exciting day, (with lots of photo taking). Thank you Santo for keeping me company, and thanks for bringing your human along. HOWEVER, please refrain from spooking me with your excessively loud farting next time, I thought you were exploding!

Love to all, 

The Rock

      X

 

The return of the ginger midget!

Something fabulously brilliant happened on Sunday. My best buddy Jobi came home!

Please be warned the following image contains extreme cuteness.

"Honey I'm Home!

Let me introduce Mr Jobi 1 Kenobi. He is the oldest wisest gingerest equine ever to walk the earth. He knows all the best tricks!

His job is to train the little people how to be good human parents. He demands a plentiful supply of grub, lots  of scratches, thorough and regular mud removal and very little exercise! Surprisingly, he even enjoys playing games and having cuddles with the mini humans. He is a supreme champion of fancy dress competitions and enjoys nothing more than slobbering over and licking the smallest of the peoples.

RAAA, I'm a lion, even scarier than Rocko!

Please sir, can I have some more?

Short term Jobi forecast: He usually has to spend most of the soggy and wild days in his jail cell (poor him) and is allowed out daily to patrol the car park area and check for security breeches. 

Long Term Jobi forecast: Once the green grassy season is upon us, the ginger midget is usually finding new and exciting ways to escape him starvation paddock. He operates in either sneeky stealth mode OR super fast electric fence dodging bullet mode. 

P.S: The white stuff has been falling from the sky again here, and Troy is STILL naked, he seems to be very waterproof. I hope it turns the ground white so that we can leap around like gymnastic idiot equines :-) 

How to greet your human

Option 1: The Angry Rocko 

Use your terrifying monster horse face. This approach is designed to scare humans into providing food but making as little contact as possible. 

I'm a mean human eating monster....

Raaaaaaaaa!

However MY human just calls me a "grumpy bum" and then scratches me on my secret weak spot which makes me do this:

Much more pleasant :-)

I am like a guard horse, scary and vicious! Mummy says nobody would have much luck ponyknapping me..whatever that means. 

(N.B- Option one can ACTUALLY terrify some humans and may lead to being labelled as "grumpy", many humans do not like to meet horses who pull such angry faces)

OPTION 2: The hyperactive slobbery Troy technique:

Immediately acknowledge humans presence and look alert and happy. Greet them enthusiastically before they even manage to get the clicky flashy picture machine out. Try to eat the clicky flashy picture machine:

CHHHHEEEESE!

This is my "baby brother", Troy. Do not be fooled by the gladiator name, he is NOT as hard or as scary as me! In fact, as demonstrated by his greeting, he is far too happy, enthusiastic and generally annoying. He likes to bother me with immature games. I like to pull my terrifying faces at him regularly to keep him in his place. He is not as clever as me either, as he is still learning to let the humans sit on top of him and do the riding thing. He is usually praised for his niceness and sweetness though. MY human's man, Flip says that Troy is more sosheeable than me, and he always feeds his apple middle to him, NOT me :-( 

In conclusion, either greeting seems to end with happy horsey faces, many carrots and piles of hay for bedtime.

Remember, it's supposed to be VERY wild and windy over the workend so make sure you batten down those hay nets and cross your surcingles correctly! 

I've got my very own blodge :-)

I've finally got my very own blodge and it's about time too!

My human says that I am now brilliant enough to have my very own blog, with a little quiet persuasion from a few friends. 

For those of you who don't already know me, I'm Rocko, also known as "The Rock". I am extremely brave and fantastic in every way (most of the time) but can also be rather grumpy and stubborn too. 

Me being a brilliant Red Dragon or is that AT the Red Dragon?!

After managing to annoy, terrify or generally bother numerous humans over the past 10 years I finally ended up with someone I had already met during my growing up years!

I didn't like being a happy hacking pony (BORING), I hated living on a farm (SCARY), I enjoyed living at the best riding school ever (but wasn't much good at teaching humans to ride) and I caused a bit of trouble when I went to be family pony (my apologies). 

However, I very much do LOVE being an endurance horse! This is a super important role which involves being super fit, fairly fast, moderately brave and a willing, trusting partner! 

It was a pretty silly accident how my human ended up with me as her endurance steed. She was just supposed to be riding me whilst I was for sale (not spending her own pennies).  Strange and fussy humans kept coming to visit me but they just kept on shaking their heads :-(  Finally I convinced my human mum that I was "special" and "talented" and "had potential". 

My new shiny equiney blodge will probably contain tales of brilliance, bravery, hilarious adventurers, friendships, troubles and endurance fun.

It will defo include lots of supa dupa horsey english language at times too, because my human says fonetic spelling is perfekt for a horse my my intell...intellajen... cleverness!  

 I hope you enjoy my fairly hairy tails!